It’ll be over soon,But not soon enough. Those were my sentiments heading into this weekend as soon as it began. As usual there were a small group of guys awaiting my arrival in order to open the shop, and immediately as I unlocked the doors after counting out my cash drawers the weekend was off to a roaring start. Saturday proved to be a busy day both in sales and for the booths as men came packs of eager, bright eyed optimistic pervs swarmed the stuffy halls looking for “Mr.Right Now”, and to no surprise several of them found what they were looking for. The sales portion of my day was pretty uneventful as nothing out of the ordinary aside for group of Sh.I.T.’s (Shanequa’s.In.Training) asking questions about specific vibrators in between spurts of laughter as if this was their first time being in a place aimed at adults. Saying things like “Eeew that N#%!a hella creepy tho'” and “He probably hella pervert.” referring to me under their breath as if I could not hear them while standing a foot away after asking me a question. Also the small gangs of under-aged teens attempting to sneak by unseen in order to look at all the “weird” and “gross” things hanging off the walls and taking up shelf space. One word of advice,if you are sneaking into a place , no matter what the place may be and do not want to draw attention to yourself a good way to do it is too not yell, laugh and cause a tremendous scene upon entry . Anyway, I spent most of the day in between customers with my nose buried in a book, Today it was “On the road” by Jack Kerouac. Sadly though I was not able to escape what was going on in the cameras sight for long as I noticed a lot of movement from the dreaded screen in the lower left half of the surveillance window. I briefly take my eyes away from my reading to see three guys reenacting a scene from “The Human Centipede” only being connected to each others hind quarters by a different part of their anatomy other than their mouths. What a lovely trio they were as well, One a tall young Latin male probably in his late 20’s, A Elderly white guy who had to be nearing his late 60’s and a rather heavyset Mexican man in his late 40’s who looked as if he had not bathed in awhile. Sparring further details , let’s just say they were really getting into their activities. Only for a brief moment though as around the corner came “Sloth” with his basketball shorts down around his ankles and one hand in his nipple lifting his shirt and the other firmly tugging away at his lower extremity.This quickly put a stop to further shenanigans.The rest of my Saturday went on without much excitement, other than the occasional weird stand off in the booths with men jousting at each other with their “you-know-whats”.
At least tha is what I thought, until about 10 mins before my shift ended and I handed the reigns over to my co-worker for the late night shift. Again, I noticed allot of activity going on in that same lower left corner of the screen. This time I could not make out what was going on as all I could see was a pretty large group of men all cluttered around in a pack. It appeared they were all looking at something but whatever it was , It was far enough out of camera range that I could not see it. Shortly after that I see what appeared to be a man running around completely nude, As I did a double take I see that it is indeed a nude man carrying his clothes as if he were heading out of a shower in a locker room. The man paced back and forth to and from the group a few times and I realize he was grabbing clothing articles he had left behind before heading into a booth to get dressed. Ironic how he has the nerve and lack of inhibition to run around the booths willy-nilly naked as a jay bird but then heads into the privacy of a booth to get dressed. Right before my relief arrives at the shop I see the little nudist, A white guy , balding,polo shirt tucked in as if headed to a weekend golf game as he is leaving the shop. “Have a good weekend Jay bird” I say as he heads for the exit. That was my Saturday, Not much different than any other.
As for Sunday….. The doughnut shop was closed for the holiday which bummed me out, So I had to make for 7-11 before the opening the shop. Upon returning to the shop I see about 3 guys circling around the doorway of the shop and preparing to head back to their respective vehicles as they see me walking up. Being that I was still about 15 minutes early I had to let them know that it was not quite time to open and 2 of them got upset and left in a huff. As I opened the shop a old Middle eastern man who is a regular in the booths walks in. I know he wants to go in the booths but he hesitates to ask for tokens,Perhaps because he knows there is no one else there yet? He roams around the store floor aimlessly and I almost wanna tell him that I know he is just here for the booths and he may as well get his tokens and wait in the back, Just as I think this a few more early morning booth patrons arrive and as suspected the middle eastern guy then gets his tokens in hopes of a Sunday funday. A few minutes pass and a man that appears to be a crackhead enters the shop, He heads to the dvd’s and I decide he does not yield me watching him close as there is nothing to steal in that section, Turns out I should have kept my eye on him as I helped a few paying customers he managed to disappear and I just knew he snuck off into the booths. Low and behold a few moments later , I spot him in the back joining a few other fellows in what appears to be a race to see who can finish themselves off fastest, As a line up of about 4-5 guys stood backs against the wall jacking off. Deciding it is not worth a scene to kick him out I let it ride. Then a hour later a young guy probably 25 or so enters and heads straight for the back “You have to pay to go back there” I shout at him and she gives me attitude and five bucks. Shortly afterward he leaves for whatever reason,Only to return several hours later requesting I let him go in the back to use his tokens. Anyway The crackhead finally leaves about 4-5 hours later and I tell him that he is to pay to go back in the booths and he returns this news with a screaming fit about how I only told him that because he was “Black” , Um….No I am telling you that because you snuck in and also you are a obvious crackhead.The shop was slow for about 2-3 hours in a row and I buried my nose into another book, This time “Ham on Rye” by Bukowski, A great read. At this point I notice something that kind of ruined my day, As I am sitting on my stool I go to scratch my nether region and realize I have a giant hole in the crotch of my pants and due to the fact I was not wearing any underwear today my balls were right out in the open. Now in a hurry to get home and fix this situation I go start my closing procedures ,And as if clockwork the store gets crowded, Flooded with couples and customers looking to make some big purchases. Normally I would not mind this and honestly welcome it, But due to the fact it is a holiday weekend and my bus is running hourly,Not too mention my pants issue I wanted to get out of there as quick as possible. Around 6:45 a guy comes in wanting booth tickets and I warn him that he only has 30 minutes , he wants them anyway. “I don’t wanna have to chase you out of here” I tell him and he nods. As I wrap up with the remaining few customers and deal with some that are problematic causing me to screw up my til because he bought a dildo his wife waiting in the car outside decided was too big and he wanted to switch it out for a smaller one. Usually we do not do any sort of exchange or return due to the sensitive nature of the products we sell, I decided to allow it since he had just left the shop. He switches it out and then returns yet again with the same issue, I said “Why do you not have your wife come in and pick something out?” to which he replied she was too embarrassed to do so. After trying to solve the guys problem by showcasing some smaller vibes and what not he opts to keep the previous one, making the entire transaction pointless and screwing up my til in the process. Now completely done with the day I head into the arcade for my dreaded sweep and low and behold a guy is still in the booths, “Time to wrap it up” I say, “Booths have been closed for 15 minutes now” I state, and Who would have guessed it was the guy I warned about time earlier. He stayed in the back for another 10 mins as I struggled to close shop but now all of the sudden customers continue to wander in. After a few more, A woman looking for Ben-Wa balls, A guy looking for a vibe and some male enhancement pills and very strange woman looking for “Poppers” (A all purpose strong cleaner that people use to sniff and get high, Posed as anything from Video Head cleaner to nail polish remover) . I finally lock the door and shout back at the guy “It’s fucking 8 o’clock! Time to get the fuck out!” to which he slowly complies and heads to the door giving me an attitude the entire way saying that I “Robbed” him by not letting him use all of his $5 worth of tickets. I told him “You have been here for more than a hour and a half, 5 bucks only gets you about 30 mins,you do the math.”, “Now have a good night.” I rush through my closing procedures and jet out to catch my bus making it only by one minute but then noticing I had left my phone charger at work and my phone was readying to die…. Happy labor day folks!
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